The story so far...A farmer from the village at the base of the mountain one day heard a voice that said "TWAH". He then began a journey to the monastery on top of the mountain to find out the Secret of Twah. In order to do so, he had to undertake a rigorous Rite of Monkhood. He lived in a tree for a full year. He recovered four cups from the village. He took a written exam, almost failed, but was granted a reprieve. Finally, he had to make his way through one hundred doors that progressively got more difficult to open. When he finally opened the last one, he learned the Secret of Twah.
Unfortunately, I can't tell you what it is. You're not a monk.
THE END
Showing posts with label The Secret of Twah. Show all posts
Showing posts with label The Secret of Twah. Show all posts
Thursday, April 3, 2008
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
The Secret of Twah, part VIII
The story so far...after passing the first two tasks in the Rite of Monkhood, the farmer failed the written exam when he missed a question about how to kill the giant bee. Having just learned it, however, the farmer was able to give the correct answer, then waited a year to find out his fate. He now has one final task to complete.
The corridor was completely dark, save for a blue glowing light far in front of him. The voice spoke into his ear. "Give me your hand."
The farmer held out his left hand, and an object was placed into it by the still unseen monk. By feel, the monk determined that it was a key.
"Go towards that blue light," said the voice. "It is a door. Use this key to open the door. Behind that door is another key and another door. Keep going through the doors, and at the end, you will learn the Secret of Twah. Good luck."
The voice was gone. The farmer was alone. He walked to the blue light and opened the door with his key. Sure enough, there was another key in the next room, which he used to open another door. And so on.
By the tenth room, the farmer had noticed that the task was getting more difficult. Whereas the first key was tiny and light, the tenth key was about the size of a normal house key. The doors seemed to be getting heavier as well. But the farmer kept going. By the twenty-fifth room, the key had gotten as large as a loaf of bread. By the fortieth room, they had gotten as large as a medium sized dog. By the fiftieth, the key was as large as a pony. By the seventy-fifth room, the keys had gotten so large and heavy that the farmer had to rest before entering the next room and going again. By the nintieth room, the key was as large as his house in the village.
When the farmer entered the ninety-ninth room, he saw a glowing light under the next door, and he knew that this was it. The one hundredth door led to the Secret of Twah. But the key was massive. He had to spend an entire day pushing it to the door, another full day lifting it, another full day pushing it into the lock, another full day turning it, and a full week trying to open the door just enough that he could squeeze through. But squeeze through he did, and learned the Secret of Twah.
NEXT: The Secret of Twah
The corridor was completely dark, save for a blue glowing light far in front of him. The voice spoke into his ear. "Give me your hand."
The farmer held out his left hand, and an object was placed into it by the still unseen monk. By feel, the monk determined that it was a key.
"Go towards that blue light," said the voice. "It is a door. Use this key to open the door. Behind that door is another key and another door. Keep going through the doors, and at the end, you will learn the Secret of Twah. Good luck."
The voice was gone. The farmer was alone. He walked to the blue light and opened the door with his key. Sure enough, there was another key in the next room, which he used to open another door. And so on.
By the tenth room, the farmer had noticed that the task was getting more difficult. Whereas the first key was tiny and light, the tenth key was about the size of a normal house key. The doors seemed to be getting heavier as well. But the farmer kept going. By the twenty-fifth room, the key had gotten as large as a loaf of bread. By the fortieth room, they had gotten as large as a medium sized dog. By the fiftieth, the key was as large as a pony. By the seventy-fifth room, the keys had gotten so large and heavy that the farmer had to rest before entering the next room and going again. By the nintieth room, the key was as large as his house in the village.
When the farmer entered the ninety-ninth room, he saw a glowing light under the next door, and he knew that this was it. The one hundredth door led to the Secret of Twah. But the key was massive. He had to spend an entire day pushing it to the door, another full day lifting it, another full day pushing it into the lock, another full day turning it, and a full week trying to open the door just enough that he could squeeze through. But squeeze through he did, and learned the Secret of Twah.
NEXT: The Secret of Twah
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
The Secret of Twah, part VII
The story so far...the farmer, after enduring a year in a tree and a quest to recover four golden cups, returned to the monastery to complete a final, written exam. However, upon returning for his test results, the farmer found out that he had failed.
The farmer stared at the closed peephole, disbelieving. It could not be over. He pounded on the door. The peephole opened almost immediately. "What do you want?" demanded the voice.
"How bad was my score?" asked the farmer.
"Terrible," said the voice. "You missed the question about the giant bee."
"I know. What else?"
"That's all."
The farmer was quite incredulous now. "You mean I got every question on that test right except the question about the giant bee, and I FAILED?"
"It was the most important question, and the one all your trials were designed to help you answer," snapped the voice. "You spent a year in the tree so you could learn how to defeat and kill the giant bee so he wouldn't attack you on your second mission. Had you learned how to kill the bee in the tree, you wouldn't have been late with the cups. Your refusal to learn even the most basic tenets of survival means you are NOT monk material! Break off his stinger...that just makes him mad. Hit him, and yes, he goes away, but he'll be back to kill you another day. Now begone! The Secret of Twah is not for you!"
"Wait!" yelled the farmer as the peephole began to close. "Tear off its wings! That's how you kill it! It can't fly, so it dies!"
The eye looked at him through the half closed peephole. "How did you learn this?"
"I fought him," said the farmer. "In the flower field. We battled for a week, and I killed him."
The eye stared at him. "Let me speak to the master of monks," said the voice. The peephole closed, and the farmer waited. An hour passed before the peephole opened again.
"The master of monks is considering your case," said the voice, "and bids you to return in one year, when he shall render a decision. The master's vote will be final."
The peephole closed, and the farmer sat. He did not return to his family. He did not explore the area. For one full year, he sat in front of the door to the monastery. He ate when he was hungry, slept when he was tired, but always sat. Through rain and snow, hail and lightning, he sat.
When the year had passed, the peephole opened and the eye looked out at him. "The master of monks has designed one final task for you," said the voice. "Complete it, and you shall know the Secret of Twah."
The door opened. The farmer stood and stepped inside.
NEXT: The FINAL Final Task
The farmer stared at the closed peephole, disbelieving. It could not be over. He pounded on the door. The peephole opened almost immediately. "What do you want?" demanded the voice.
"How bad was my score?" asked the farmer.
"Terrible," said the voice. "You missed the question about the giant bee."
"I know. What else?"
"That's all."
The farmer was quite incredulous now. "You mean I got every question on that test right except the question about the giant bee, and I FAILED?"
"It was the most important question, and the one all your trials were designed to help you answer," snapped the voice. "You spent a year in the tree so you could learn how to defeat and kill the giant bee so he wouldn't attack you on your second mission. Had you learned how to kill the bee in the tree, you wouldn't have been late with the cups. Your refusal to learn even the most basic tenets of survival means you are NOT monk material! Break off his stinger...that just makes him mad. Hit him, and yes, he goes away, but he'll be back to kill you another day. Now begone! The Secret of Twah is not for you!"
"Wait!" yelled the farmer as the peephole began to close. "Tear off its wings! That's how you kill it! It can't fly, so it dies!"
The eye looked at him through the half closed peephole. "How did you learn this?"
"I fought him," said the farmer. "In the flower field. We battled for a week, and I killed him."
The eye stared at him. "Let me speak to the master of monks," said the voice. The peephole closed, and the farmer waited. An hour passed before the peephole opened again.
"The master of monks is considering your case," said the voice, "and bids you to return in one year, when he shall render a decision. The master's vote will be final."
The peephole closed, and the farmer sat. He did not return to his family. He did not explore the area. For one full year, he sat in front of the door to the monastery. He ate when he was hungry, slept when he was tired, but always sat. Through rain and snow, hail and lightning, he sat.
When the year had passed, the peephole opened and the eye looked out at him. "The master of monks has designed one final task for you," said the voice. "Complete it, and you shall know the Secret of Twah."
The door opened. The farmer stood and stepped inside.
NEXT: The FINAL Final Task
Monday, March 31, 2008
The Secret of Twah, part VI
The story so far...the farmer has barely gotten through the first two trials of the Rite of Monkhood. He spent a year in a tree, but his answers did not seem to satisfy the doorkeeper. He recovered four golden cups, but took five minutes longer than allotted. Now, he is about to begin his final exam.
The farmer looked through the stack of papers. Five hundred questions. Mostly multiple choice, though there were a few essay questions. Nothing else to do but get started.
The questions were pretty easy for the farmer. Most of them had to do with things he had learned in his time on the mountain. There was a question about how to disperse the tiny bats (light), several questions about the flowers in the field, a few questions about fruits of the trees, and several questions about the habits of roving vagabonds. However, it was question number 500 that tripped him up.
He looked over his answers, confident that he had passed. As soon as his time was up, the door opened, and a hood was thrust over his head. He was walked back through endless corridors, though he couldn't tell if it was the same direction as the first time. Finally, the hood was removed, and he found himself outside the monastery again. He turned to see the eye looking at him from the peephole.
"We will grade the test. Come back in a month for the results." The peephole shut.
The farmer spent most of the next month wandering around the forest. He met several roving vagabonds (who oddly enough only seemed to rove in one place), and had tea with them. Then they beat him up, but it was more for their image than anything else. The farmer also visited the flower field, and was horrified when he was attacked by the giant bee. Its stinger had regrown a bit, not nearly as long and menacing as it was, but still intimidating. Obviously, losing its stinger hadn't killed him. The farmer fought the bee, and after an epic battle that lasted a week, the farmer ripped the bee's wings off. The bee fell to the ground and was still. It was dead.
The month passed, and he returned to the monastery. After he knocked, he waited for five minutes before the peephole finally opened, very slowly.
"You failed," said the voice icily. The farmer stared in shock. The eye regarded him. "Sorry. No monkhood for you. No Secret of Twah. Goodbye." And the peephole closed.
NEXT: A Second Chance
The farmer looked through the stack of papers. Five hundred questions. Mostly multiple choice, though there were a few essay questions. Nothing else to do but get started.
The questions were pretty easy for the farmer. Most of them had to do with things he had learned in his time on the mountain. There was a question about how to disperse the tiny bats (light), several questions about the flowers in the field, a few questions about fruits of the trees, and several questions about the habits of roving vagabonds. However, it was question number 500 that tripped him up.
- 500. How do you kill the giant bee?
He looked over his answers, confident that he had passed. As soon as his time was up, the door opened, and a hood was thrust over his head. He was walked back through endless corridors, though he couldn't tell if it was the same direction as the first time. Finally, the hood was removed, and he found himself outside the monastery again. He turned to see the eye looking at him from the peephole.
"We will grade the test. Come back in a month for the results." The peephole shut.
The farmer spent most of the next month wandering around the forest. He met several roving vagabonds (who oddly enough only seemed to rove in one place), and had tea with them. Then they beat him up, but it was more for their image than anything else. The farmer also visited the flower field, and was horrified when he was attacked by the giant bee. Its stinger had regrown a bit, not nearly as long and menacing as it was, but still intimidating. Obviously, losing its stinger hadn't killed him. The farmer fought the bee, and after an epic battle that lasted a week, the farmer ripped the bee's wings off. The bee fell to the ground and was still. It was dead.
The month passed, and he returned to the monastery. After he knocked, he waited for five minutes before the peephole finally opened, very slowly.
"You failed," said the voice icily. The farmer stared in shock. The eye regarded him. "Sorry. No monkhood for you. No Secret of Twah. Goodbye." And the peephole closed.
NEXT: A Second Chance
The Secret of Twah, part V
The story so far...the farmer, in order to become a monk and learn the Secret of Twah, spent one year in a tree and recovered four golden cups from the village at the base of the mountain. He is now ascending the mountain, praying that he has completed his second task in time.
After a perilous journey through hailstones the size of watermelons, thunderstorms with lightning striking trees all around him, obligatory attacks by roving bands of vagabonds (some of whom now knew him on a first name basis), and no encounters with the giant bee (mercifully), the farmer arrived at the monastery and pounded on the door. The peephole opened immediately, and the eye looked out at him. The stare seemed very cold. The voice did not speak.
"Um," said the farmer. "I have returned with the golden cups."
"You're late," said the voice. There was definite anger there.
The farmer's heart sank. "By how long?"
"Five minutes," said the voice.
"Five minutes?" said the farmer, incredulous. "Well, I would have been back here much sooner, but there was this giant bee..."
"Did you hit it and make it go away?" asked the voice. There was a taunting tone there.
"No," said the farmer. "It stung me, and I was unconscious for...well, for a while."
"You have the cups?" The farmer pulled them out of his bag and showed them to the eye. The eye looked at the letters T-W-A-H, then the voice spoke again. "Very well. You will be deducted five points for tardiness. Return in one month for your written exam."
"Five points? Written exam? What?" asked the farmer, but the peephole had already closed.
After a month without incident (shockingly), the farmer returned to the monastery. The door opened, and he was admitted, though a hood was placed over his head. He was led through countless corridors, until he was forced into a chair.
"You may remove your hood," said the voice, and the farmer did so. He looked around to see a small, featureless room. There was a torch in the corner, but no window or other source of light. He was seated at a small wooden table. On the table was a large stack of papers and a quill. A peephole was open on the door, and the eye was looking at him. "You have five hours," said the voice. "Begin."
NEXT: The Test
After a perilous journey through hailstones the size of watermelons, thunderstorms with lightning striking trees all around him, obligatory attacks by roving bands of vagabonds (some of whom now knew him on a first name basis), and no encounters with the giant bee (mercifully), the farmer arrived at the monastery and pounded on the door. The peephole opened immediately, and the eye looked out at him. The stare seemed very cold. The voice did not speak.
"Um," said the farmer. "I have returned with the golden cups."
"You're late," said the voice. There was definite anger there.
The farmer's heart sank. "By how long?"
"Five minutes," said the voice.
"Five minutes?" said the farmer, incredulous. "Well, I would have been back here much sooner, but there was this giant bee..."
"Did you hit it and make it go away?" asked the voice. There was a taunting tone there.
"No," said the farmer. "It stung me, and I was unconscious for...well, for a while."
"You have the cups?" The farmer pulled them out of his bag and showed them to the eye. The eye looked at the letters T-W-A-H, then the voice spoke again. "Very well. You will be deducted five points for tardiness. Return in one month for your written exam."
"Five points? Written exam? What?" asked the farmer, but the peephole had already closed.
After a month without incident (shockingly), the farmer returned to the monastery. The door opened, and he was admitted, though a hood was placed over his head. He was led through countless corridors, until he was forced into a chair.
"You may remove your hood," said the voice, and the farmer did so. He looked around to see a small, featureless room. There was a torch in the corner, but no window or other source of light. He was seated at a small wooden table. On the table was a large stack of papers and a quill. A peephole was open on the door, and the eye was looking at him. "You have five hours," said the voice. "Begin."
NEXT: The Test
Sunday, March 30, 2008
The Secret of Twah, part IV
The story so far...the farmer, obsessed with the Secret of Twah, has undertaken the mystical Rite of Monkhood in order to become a monk. He stayed in a tree for one year, then began a quest to collect four golden cups. However, during his journey down the mountain, he was stung by the giant bee and passed out.
The farmer was aware that water was dripping on his face. He opened his eyes and was greeted by a world that was white and green at the same time. He sat up. Snow was melting off the blooming trees. It must be early spring. He had been unconscious for three whole seasons.
Sudden panic gripped him. Three quarters of his year must be gone! He had to hurry. He leapt to his feet and began running down the mountain. He was not attacked in that whole time, partly because the roving band of vagabonds he encountered either couldn't keep up or decided to give him a break this time.
When the farmer reached the village at the base of the mountain, he finally stopped to collect himself. The voice belonging to the eye had told him the cups were at the base of the mountain, but it did not say where. It definitely didn't say they were in the village. Why had he assumed that? It must have been because he was so excited about finally seeing his family. Where should he begin?
Logically, the cups would not be here. No one in the village knew anything about the monks or Twah. The farmer wouldn't even know who to ask. He had lived here for nine years, but hadn't been back in two. The cups must be hidden in some cave or something. He would have to hurry. Maybe he could get a horse.
The horse dealership was, unfortunately, closed for the weekend. The farmer resigned himself to a long run...he had no idea how far it was around the mountain, but he was sure it wasn't short. The only good thing was that he could just go straight up from wherever he found the cups, as the monastery was on top of the mountain.
As he ran down the streets, however, something caught his eye in a store window. He went back to look. Four golden cups gleamed through the glass. The cups were in a row, and each was engraved with a letter that read W-H-A-T.
"What?" wondered the farmer. "Is this what I'm looking for? Is this something a true monk would know?"
Then it hit him. Why didn't he know the Secret of Twah yet? Because he was not a monk. A true monk would know the Secret. The shopkeeper was not a monk, so he had arranged the letters into a word he knew.
W-H-A-T, unscrambled, spelled T-W-A-H.
The farmer raced into the shop and bought all four cups (for an outrageous price, he thought, but he didn't have time to haggle). He then began to climb the mountain, hoping against hope that he wasn't too late.
NEXT: The Final Task
The farmer was aware that water was dripping on his face. He opened his eyes and was greeted by a world that was white and green at the same time. He sat up. Snow was melting off the blooming trees. It must be early spring. He had been unconscious for three whole seasons.
Sudden panic gripped him. Three quarters of his year must be gone! He had to hurry. He leapt to his feet and began running down the mountain. He was not attacked in that whole time, partly because the roving band of vagabonds he encountered either couldn't keep up or decided to give him a break this time.
When the farmer reached the village at the base of the mountain, he finally stopped to collect himself. The voice belonging to the eye had told him the cups were at the base of the mountain, but it did not say where. It definitely didn't say they were in the village. Why had he assumed that? It must have been because he was so excited about finally seeing his family. Where should he begin?
Logically, the cups would not be here. No one in the village knew anything about the monks or Twah. The farmer wouldn't even know who to ask. He had lived here for nine years, but hadn't been back in two. The cups must be hidden in some cave or something. He would have to hurry. Maybe he could get a horse.
The horse dealership was, unfortunately, closed for the weekend. The farmer resigned himself to a long run...he had no idea how far it was around the mountain, but he was sure it wasn't short. The only good thing was that he could just go straight up from wherever he found the cups, as the monastery was on top of the mountain.
As he ran down the streets, however, something caught his eye in a store window. He went back to look. Four golden cups gleamed through the glass. The cups were in a row, and each was engraved with a letter that read W-H-A-T.
"What?" wondered the farmer. "Is this what I'm looking for? Is this something a true monk would know?"
Then it hit him. Why didn't he know the Secret of Twah yet? Because he was not a monk. A true monk would know the Secret. The shopkeeper was not a monk, so he had arranged the letters into a word he knew.
W-H-A-T, unscrambled, spelled T-W-A-H.
The farmer raced into the shop and bought all four cups (for an outrageous price, he thought, but he didn't have time to haggle). He then began to climb the mountain, hoping against hope that he wasn't too late.
NEXT: The Final Task
Thursday, March 27, 2008
The Secret of Twah, part III
The story so far...a farmer from the village at the base of the mountain has begun the Rite of Monkhood so he may learn the Secret of Twah. As we left him, he had just completed the first task, staying in a tree for one year.
The farmer arrived at the monastery and knocked on the door. The peephole opened, and the eye looked out at him. "Yes?" asked the voice.
"I have completed my year in the tree," said the farmer.
"Oh?" asked the voice. "Why were you in the tree?"
The farmer stared. "Because...you said it was part of the Rite of Monkhood?"
"And why do you want to become a monk?"
"Because I want to learn the Secret of Twah."
The eye looked at the farmer for a long time. Then, the voice asked, "And what did you learn from your time in the tree?"
The farmer had been thinking about this for a year, and replied, "Many things. I think the greatest lesson was that need and want are separate. You can do without the things you want, and the things you need will be provided to you."
The eye couldn't frown, as it was not a mouth. However, it definitely gave off the impression that it was frowning. Then, the voice asked, "And the giant bee? Did you learn anything about the giant bee?"
"Um..." said the farmer, confused. He had not expected his encounter with the giant bee to be that important. "Hit him and he goes away?"
The eye stared. "I guess that will do for now. You still have a long way to go before you are a monk. For your next task, you must go to the base of the mountain and recover four golden cups. You must be back here in exactly one year, or you will never become a monk."
"Four golden cups?" asked the farmer. "How will I know they are the ones you want?"
"A true monk would know," said the voice. The peephole shut, and the farmer set off down the mountain. His thoughts were elated with the time he had to search for the cups. Maybe if he found them quickly enough, he could go home and visit with his family. At the very least, he could find out how they were doing.
However, trouble befell him at almost every turn on his journey down. He had to battle a bear, a herd of llamas, several bands of roving vagabonds that may or may not have attacked him before, and the giant bee. His battle with the giant bee was less successful than before, and the bee stung him. The last thing the farmer thought before the world went black was, "I must know the Secret of Twah. I must survive. I must..."
NEXT: Time Running Out
The farmer arrived at the monastery and knocked on the door. The peephole opened, and the eye looked out at him. "Yes?" asked the voice.
"I have completed my year in the tree," said the farmer.
"Oh?" asked the voice. "Why were you in the tree?"
The farmer stared. "Because...you said it was part of the Rite of Monkhood?"
"And why do you want to become a monk?"
"Because I want to learn the Secret of Twah."
The eye looked at the farmer for a long time. Then, the voice asked, "And what did you learn from your time in the tree?"
The farmer had been thinking about this for a year, and replied, "Many things. I think the greatest lesson was that need and want are separate. You can do without the things you want, and the things you need will be provided to you."
The eye couldn't frown, as it was not a mouth. However, it definitely gave off the impression that it was frowning. Then, the voice asked, "And the giant bee? Did you learn anything about the giant bee?"
"Um..." said the farmer, confused. He had not expected his encounter with the giant bee to be that important. "Hit him and he goes away?"
The eye stared. "I guess that will do for now. You still have a long way to go before you are a monk. For your next task, you must go to the base of the mountain and recover four golden cups. You must be back here in exactly one year, or you will never become a monk."
"Four golden cups?" asked the farmer. "How will I know they are the ones you want?"
"A true monk would know," said the voice. The peephole shut, and the farmer set off down the mountain. His thoughts were elated with the time he had to search for the cups. Maybe if he found them quickly enough, he could go home and visit with his family. At the very least, he could find out how they were doing.
However, trouble befell him at almost every turn on his journey down. He had to battle a bear, a herd of llamas, several bands of roving vagabonds that may or may not have attacked him before, and the giant bee. His battle with the giant bee was less successful than before, and the bee stung him. The last thing the farmer thought before the world went black was, "I must know the Secret of Twah. I must survive. I must..."
NEXT: Time Running Out
The Secret of Twah, part II
The story so far...our hero, a farmer from the village at the base of the mountain, has journeyed to the top in order to discover the Secret of Twah. However, since he is not a monk, he cannot know. We join the farmer as he waits for his Rite of Monkhood.
One month passed. Since he could not return home and make it back to the monastery in time, the farmer used the opportunity to explore the area around the monastery. He found many wonders, including a cave that led underground to a large cavern where the natural rock formations had eroded into beautiful shapes over time. He found a field full of flowers that he had never seen before, and were so lovely they made him weep. He found a grove of trees that seemed taller than he though was possible, stretching until they seemed to scrape the sky.
For every wonder the farmer found, however, he found more trouble. The cave was inhabited by a ruthless swarm of tiny bats, and he had to flee into the light to escape their terrible stinging bites. In the field of flowers, he encountered a giant bee that tried to harpoon him, and managed to escape by hitting it between the eyes with a rock. In the forest grove, he encountered several roving bands of vagabonds, some of whom he thought had attacked him during his journey up the mountain, and all of whom attacked him this time too.
After the month had passed, the farmer returned to the monastery and knocked on the door. The peephole slid open, and the same eye peered out at him. "Yes?" said the voice.
"I'm here to complete the Rite of Monkhood," said the farmer.
The eye looked at him. "Why do you want to become a monk?"
"So I can learn the Secret of Twah."
The eye stared unblinkingly at the farmer, who didn't move. Finally, the voice said, "Very well. To the south is a grove of trees with trees that grow taller than anywhere else in the world."
"I've been there," replied the farmer.
"Good. In the center, there is a tree, even taller and wider than the others. You will know it because the entire base is covered in ivy. It is the only tree where this is so. Climb the tree, and remain among its branches for one full year. When you descend, come back here and tell me what you learned."
The peephole closed, and the farmer set off to the grove of trees. He found the ivy covered base, fought off the roving band of vagabonds that were camped there, and climbed the tree. Over the course of the next year, the farmer learned much. He learned that nature provided everything necessary for his survival. Fruit and leaves to eat from the tree, water to drink from the sky, air to breathe, and beauty to enjoy. However, nature also provided its own challenges. Packs of ravenous wolves would stand at the base and howl at him. Giant eagles would swoop down from the sky to try and pluck him from the tree. Mad squirrels would taunt him and flee from his grasp. The giant bee from the flower field tracked him down and the two did battle two hundred feet above the earth. The farmer managed to defeat the bee with a well aimed kick at the bee's stomach.
The autumn came, then the winter. Leaves and fruit were no longer available, but the farmer subsisted on a steady diet of bark and insects. The spring arrived, and the farmer rejoiced to be able to eat fruit once again. Finally, the summer arrived, and the year had passed. The farmer descended from the tree, and returned to the monastery.
NEXT: The Next Phase
One month passed. Since he could not return home and make it back to the monastery in time, the farmer used the opportunity to explore the area around the monastery. He found many wonders, including a cave that led underground to a large cavern where the natural rock formations had eroded into beautiful shapes over time. He found a field full of flowers that he had never seen before, and were so lovely they made him weep. He found a grove of trees that seemed taller than he though was possible, stretching until they seemed to scrape the sky.
For every wonder the farmer found, however, he found more trouble. The cave was inhabited by a ruthless swarm of tiny bats, and he had to flee into the light to escape their terrible stinging bites. In the field of flowers, he encountered a giant bee that tried to harpoon him, and managed to escape by hitting it between the eyes with a rock. In the forest grove, he encountered several roving bands of vagabonds, some of whom he thought had attacked him during his journey up the mountain, and all of whom attacked him this time too.
After the month had passed, the farmer returned to the monastery and knocked on the door. The peephole slid open, and the same eye peered out at him. "Yes?" said the voice.
"I'm here to complete the Rite of Monkhood," said the farmer.
The eye looked at him. "Why do you want to become a monk?"
"So I can learn the Secret of Twah."
The eye stared unblinkingly at the farmer, who didn't move. Finally, the voice said, "Very well. To the south is a grove of trees with trees that grow taller than anywhere else in the world."
"I've been there," replied the farmer.
"Good. In the center, there is a tree, even taller and wider than the others. You will know it because the entire base is covered in ivy. It is the only tree where this is so. Climb the tree, and remain among its branches for one full year. When you descend, come back here and tell me what you learned."
The peephole closed, and the farmer set off to the grove of trees. He found the ivy covered base, fought off the roving band of vagabonds that were camped there, and climbed the tree. Over the course of the next year, the farmer learned much. He learned that nature provided everything necessary for his survival. Fruit and leaves to eat from the tree, water to drink from the sky, air to breathe, and beauty to enjoy. However, nature also provided its own challenges. Packs of ravenous wolves would stand at the base and howl at him. Giant eagles would swoop down from the sky to try and pluck him from the tree. Mad squirrels would taunt him and flee from his grasp. The giant bee from the flower field tracked him down and the two did battle two hundred feet above the earth. The farmer managed to defeat the bee with a well aimed kick at the bee's stomach.
The autumn came, then the winter. Leaves and fruit were no longer available, but the farmer subsisted on a steady diet of bark and insects. The spring arrived, and the farmer rejoiced to be able to eat fruit once again. Finally, the summer arrived, and the year had passed. The farmer descended from the tree, and returned to the monastery.
NEXT: The Next Phase
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
The Secret of Twah, part I
This is not a completely original story by me, just an adaptation of an old joke I was told as a youth. It's long, and the ending may be upsetting to some, but here is my interpratation, which is much shorter than the original. Don't say I didn't warn you. And be glad I didn't decide to retell the Fluffy Dog Joke.
THE SECRET OF TWAH
Once upon a time, in a far off land, lived a farmer. He was not native to the area, but had moved there when he married his wife nine years previously. The couple had two lovely children, and lived in the farmhouse at the base of the mountain.
One day, as the farmer worked in the fields, he heard a booming voice from the top of the mountain. The voice said a single word:
"TWAH."
The farmer stopped and listened, but heard nothing else. Bewildered he asked his wife about it.
"Oh yes," she replied. "That's just Twah. It happens every ten years. No one really knows anything about it, except for the monks."
"Monks?" the farmer asked.
"Yes," said his wife. "There's a monastery up at the top of the mountain. They are the sacred keepers of the Secret of Twah. If you want to know more about it, you'll have to ask them, because that's all anyone else knows."
Over the next few weeks, the farmer became obsessed with the Secret of Twah. Finally, he determined to discover the meaning of the mysterious word by going to the top of the mountain and asking the monks in person. He kissed his family and set off on the perilous journey.
It took him three months to reach the top of the mountain. In that time, he was attacked by six cougars, three giant eagles, a pack of ravenous wolves, several bands of roving vagabonds (he lost count because some of them attacked him multiple times), and an ill-tempered ferret. Finally, he reached the monastery at the top of the mountain and knocked.
A peephole opened, and a single green eye peered out at him. "Yes?" a voice, presumably belonging to the eye, asked.
"I've traveled from the village at the base of the mountain, and endurd much suffering along the way," the farmer replied. "I have come all this way because I want to learn the Secret of Twah."
The eye regarded him for a while, then the voice said, "I can't tell you. You're not a monk."
The peephole shut. The farmer stood and stared for a moment, then banged on the door again. The peephole opened, and the eye looked out at him again. "Yes?" the voice said.
"I have to know the Secret of Twah," the farmer said. "I have left everything behind. I must know!"
The eye looked at him. "Then you have to become a monk."
"Fine," said the farmer. "How do I become a monk?"
"We must prepare the Rite of Monkhood," said the voice. "Come back in one month."
NEXT: The Rite Begins
THE SECRET OF TWAH
Once upon a time, in a far off land, lived a farmer. He was not native to the area, but had moved there when he married his wife nine years previously. The couple had two lovely children, and lived in the farmhouse at the base of the mountain.
One day, as the farmer worked in the fields, he heard a booming voice from the top of the mountain. The voice said a single word:
"TWAH."
The farmer stopped and listened, but heard nothing else. Bewildered he asked his wife about it.
"Oh yes," she replied. "That's just Twah. It happens every ten years. No one really knows anything about it, except for the monks."
"Monks?" the farmer asked.
"Yes," said his wife. "There's a monastery up at the top of the mountain. They are the sacred keepers of the Secret of Twah. If you want to know more about it, you'll have to ask them, because that's all anyone else knows."
Over the next few weeks, the farmer became obsessed with the Secret of Twah. Finally, he determined to discover the meaning of the mysterious word by going to the top of the mountain and asking the monks in person. He kissed his family and set off on the perilous journey.
It took him three months to reach the top of the mountain. In that time, he was attacked by six cougars, three giant eagles, a pack of ravenous wolves, several bands of roving vagabonds (he lost count because some of them attacked him multiple times), and an ill-tempered ferret. Finally, he reached the monastery at the top of the mountain and knocked.
A peephole opened, and a single green eye peered out at him. "Yes?" a voice, presumably belonging to the eye, asked.
"I've traveled from the village at the base of the mountain, and endurd much suffering along the way," the farmer replied. "I have come all this way because I want to learn the Secret of Twah."
The eye regarded him for a while, then the voice said, "I can't tell you. You're not a monk."
The peephole shut. The farmer stood and stared for a moment, then banged on the door again. The peephole opened, and the eye looked out at him again. "Yes?" the voice said.
"I have to know the Secret of Twah," the farmer said. "I have left everything behind. I must know!"
The eye looked at him. "Then you have to become a monk."
"Fine," said the farmer. "How do I become a monk?"
"We must prepare the Rite of Monkhood," said the voice. "Come back in one month."
NEXT: The Rite Begins
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